Penis Reduction Surgery Available from CFTS!

Fed up with taunts? Tired of the old jokes? "Hey Donkey Dick!" or "It's like a baby's arm holding a grapefruit!" Afraid to unleash your pythonesque manhood in a public convenience for fear of abuse and ridicule due to the enormity of your magnificent appendage? Yes, many of us have been there, and frankly, we've had enough. The pointing, the smiling, the jealous looks and high definition, zoom-photography has to stop. Isn't it bad enough when we hear our women groan in pain/pleasure, and watch them recoil as they try to accommodate our gigantic organs? Well our scientists at CFTS have discovered a new procedure which can reduce the size of our terrific tadgers, and thus become part of normal society again. Yes, we too would like a 12" penis, instead of these 18" monsters we have to cart around 24/7. The reduction procedure can be performed in the privacy of your own home. To receive the CFTS Tadger Reduction Kit and instructions, members please send 15 vouchers from bumper jars of Leonard Flaky's Leprosy Cream. Non-members can sod off.

Technorati Tags: Penis Reduction climax orgasm Gigantic Organ

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Fed Up With Those Tired Bones & Arthritic Joints? ...

We all know what it's like to have aches and pains. But often these pains are caused by arthritis. This can be brought on by old age, or by previous injuries, often in sport. Well suffer no more! 'Cure For The Sore' scientists have come up with an amazing cure! This is the incredible new FULL SKELETAL TRANSPLANT or FST for short. For an analogy, imagine a glove on an aching, old arthritic hand. Take the glove off and place it on a perfect hand with no joint pains or crumbling bones. CFTS proposes to replace your old, arthritic useless seleton with a healthy donour skeleton. The picture above shows patients after receiving their new donour skeletons. See how delighted they are with their new set of bones. They are now waiting for their flesh to be replaced in the second part of the transplant. If you are intrested in receiving a FST, then contact CFTS, at the City of London Mortuary, The Old Kent Rd., London SE 09. Special discounts in April 2008 on production of a FemFresh Bumper Pack voucher.

Technorati Tags: Skeletal Transplant Arthritis Cure Skeleton Aching Joints Transplant Surgery

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Let Oscar Pistorius Compete in the Olympics!

The world governing body of the Olympics (what a fancy title for such a bunch of wankers!) have no right to prevent Oscar Pistorius from competing in the Olympics. If he achieves the necessary qualifying times in his disciplines, then he should go. They've been allowing the filthy drug cheats to compete for decades - and also giving them a second chance! So it is the duty of all the International Association of Athletics Federation (IAAF), to allow this superb athlete to compete on the world's stage. Elio Locatelli of the IAAF - you have seen this guy, he is the real deal. These carbon fibre legs have been used in Paralympics competions for 10 years! Have you noticed Dwayne Chambers has the same initials as Drug Cheat?
What is your opinion?

Technorati Tags: Oscar pistorius Olympics UK Athletis Drug Cheats

IAAF Paralympics Carbon Fibre Legs Dwayne Chambers Elio Locatelli

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