Betty-Snapping: Eats her Shopping in the Queue!

Amazing picture of a "trendy" Betty queuing at the till in a supermarket. But where are her cakes and pies? You may well ask. Look no further than the protuberance below her neck. Yes, you've guessed it! She's scoffed the lot! Filthy!

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Great Betty-Snapping from Pipeboy

What a picture! Here we have several Betties grazing at a pic-nic site at Nottingham Races. This beautifuuly serene photograph depicts the gentle nature of these placid beasts - but only if not disturbed while troughing! Congratulations to Pipeboy, one of our bravest CFTS Reporters who risked life and limb to capture this amazing shot

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Betty-Snapping! A Pastime for all the Family.

Betty-Snapping is sweeping the country - and everyone can join in and have fun!
The term 'Betty' or 'Betties' in the plural, is the generic term applied to very fat, greedy women. To participate in the game all you need is a camera and a sharp eye. A mobile-phone camera is preferable and less noticeable, as some of these Betties do not like to be photographed. I will publish your photographs on CFTS blog, and will award special prizes for best Betty-Snap of the month. 'What am I looking for?' you may well ask. Obviously the fatter and more obese the better - and while eating - you're onto a winner! Try and snap them at supermarkets. You will generally find them grazing aroung cake and pie shelves. Bonus marks will be awarded if you catch them in the act of picking up a large cake or pie. Even better if you snap them while eating their purchases while queueing at the till.
I am also looking for attitude. The picture below(one of my personal favourites) shows a decent size Betty selecting her cake while doing a little dance to the supermarket music.
You will also receive good marks for Betties smoking and having tattoos. Big fat Betties generally give birth to tiny babies(aka peas), as the pure little buggers have nowhere to grow - mamas pies and cakes are taking up all the space. So snapshots of Betties and their peas are very welcome.
So come on people get Betty-Snapping and send me your pictures!

Murphy and Ford Slain in Mafia Drive-by Shooting

Notorious mobsters Cormac "Soft-Hands" Murphy and Ron "Smirnoff" Ford were gunned down today as their limousine carrying them from Faro Airport stopped at traffic lights. Portuguese Police say it bears all ther hallmarks of a Mafia contract killing. It is believed Ford and Murphy were extending their drinking operations from Spain and into the lucrative Algarve market. These heinous thugs "sell" their drinking talents to the highest bidding bars, clubs or pubs. Once installed in their watering hole, they then proceed to drink the place dry, attracting thousands of tourists. This of course brings in great rewards to the bar owners, and the 2 crooks share the profits. The Mafia wanted these two back in Italy, and after they refused, they effectivelys signed their own death warrants.

Editor's note.

We apologise for the above article. The picture actually shows the couple "resting" after a long flight from the UK.

Technorati Tags: Contract Killing Mafia Faro Airport Smirnoff Vodka

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