Rare Shot of Betty with Mate

Pipeboy has done it again! With no thought of his own safety he has entered the secret lair of a brutally agressive Betty* during a feeding and mating ritual. If discovered, it would have been the end of our intrepid reporter. See how the Betty has lured the emaciated male in his wife-beater** into her trap by loading her trolly with pies, cakes and crisps. Once the male takes the bait and mounts the fat bitch, it's all over for him. She will devour the tattooed dickhead after he has inseminated her. Well done Pipeboy - Sir David Attenborough sends his regards!

* Largearsibum Biteyerbolloxibus (lat)

** Wife-beater: vest worn by tattooed doleite who beats his wife

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Liverpool Daily Post Review of "Liverpool VCs"

Message from the author James Murphy:
On google UK, type in "liverpool daily post", and go to "features and entertainment", then scroll down to find"liverpudlian heroes unnoticed in the crowd" and you might see something interesting.not as exactly as i said it, but there it is."
Or you can go direct to the link on http://www.liverpooldailypost.co.uk/liverpool-life-features/liverpool-special-features/2008/09/15/liverpudlian-heroes-unnoticed-in-the-crowd-64375-21822475/

Also note there are 3 pages to the article so make sure you advance to through them all.
A couple of typos by the Daily Post - James Murphy is quoted as being 62 - that should be 26!

Here is the start of the article ...Liverpudlian heroes unnoticed in the crowdSep 15 2008 by David Charters, Liverpool Daily Post From glory to destitution, life was often cruel for Liverpool’s bravest of the brave, as a new book about VCs tells us. David Charters reportsHE WAS just a cripple hobbling down the old road in a threadbare coat. "Poor fella," said the few through frosted breath. But most didn’t even notice him in the bustle of the day and he vanished from view, still limping.The trouble is that brave men rarely look like heroes. Movie stars look like heroes. But most people, who are really brave, look like the rest of us, faces lost in the crowd.True valour and the romantic picture of heroism have never had much in common.James Murphy knows that, as can be read in his latest book, which tells of how 23 Liverpudlians received the Victoria Cross for gallantry in various actions from the Crimean War to World War One .........

Technorati Tags: James Murphy Liverpool VCs Liverpool Daily Post Liverpool Echo Pen and Sword

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Betties on Wheels Mystery Solved!

Have you noticed all the motorised disabled vehicles around our shopping precincts lately? I performed an in-depth research program into this phenomena and came to the conclusion that the growth of these vehicles directly correlates to the growth in girth measurements of ... you've guessed it ... Betties! These beasts spend a majority of their lives stuffing their faces with pies, cakes, burgers, lard-butties and watercress. When they become so fat and lazy and claim they are unable to walk - they register themselves as disabled and the taxpayers' money provides them with a handy little motor to cart their monstrous fat arses around our shops.
The picture shows yet another example. (lovely legs!)

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Betties from Hong Kong!

Our intrepid CFTS Betty Correspondent reports from Hong Kong and the growing trend of Betties! Over to you Snapagut:

"Here are some bettys taken on Lantau Island in Hong Kong. The first 2 are Australians I saw on the bus, and the other one was a huge bitch being carted around by a child on a bike."

Is this the reason why Tiddlywinks are so small and puny? Is it because the Betties ate all the pies and fried rice? We want your comments!

Technorati Tags: Hong Kong Big Fat Women Lard Arses Obese Bitches Lazy Australia Cows

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